BRIDAL TIPS
I've been doing weddings for over 18 years.
I've seen it all---weddings on the beach, in ballrooms, in hotels, resorts, ships, boats, villas, private homes...you name it.
Whether you decide to use my services or not.....Here are some tips to help you keep you sane.
What kind of music?
People always seem to ask me, what are the "Hot Wedding Songs"?
This is the #1 question people always ask me, since most have never been through the wedding process before.
I love all types of music, which is what I think helps me with my DJ'ing. As far as the "Hot" songs for a wedding, there are so many choices out there, it can boggle a bride and groom sometimes. In my opinion, it's whatever the bride and groom enjoy and has meaning to them. Making it all work, is more of what my job is all about.
For some ideas (these are just ideas), try my Wedding Jukebox it lists some of the songs people have asked for from me lately and might spark an idea or two for you.
What goes on at a wedding reception?
If you've been married before, skip this part, if you haven't, you may find this part helpful.
There's no real "set" way to do a wedding reception. Everyone has thier own things they want to do at a reception--and in my opinion, there are no rules regarding that.
Some people have a "first dance", some people don't. Some people toss the bouquet and garter at the ceremony, some at the reception--some people don't do it at all--it's really YOUR CHOICE.
Here's some of the common things people do at receptions--
#1. Introduction of the Bridal Party, Introduction of the Bride and Groom.
This is usually done with a song behind it, some people just announce the bride and groom--others do the entire party, some people just do the "principals" (the maid of honor, parents, best man, etc.)
Keep in mind, your entry will be only several seconds long, depending on where you are walking out from. Keep in mind, to cross a room only takes seconds, so I sometimes recommend using the beginning of the first dance, if it has a long lead in and then going straight into the "first dance" for the rest of it. Make sure whoever is announcing you, knows exactly how you want to be billed beforehand (ie, "John and Lucy Smith" or "Mr and Mrs John Smith, etc). Also make sure you get a list of anyone else in the Wedding Party who is being announced, and that it is sent ahead of time to the DJ or MC.
#2. First Dance
Some people do it upon announcing and entry and other people do the first dance after dinner is served (if it is served). Keep in mind, that songs over 3 or 4 minutes long can seem like an eternity for some. So, make sure you stand in your living room with your significant other before the wedding and see how it feels to you (and don't forget your guests will all be standing by as well).
#3. Parents Dance
Some couples do the parents dance after the first dance, other do the parents dance after dinner, with the first dance before dinner. Again, it's up to you. If your parents are deceased or not present, don't sweat it. Nobody says you have to do anything, some people instead dance with other family members or important people, others skip it all together.
#4. Bouquet & Garter
Can be done anytime you wish. It can be omitted if you choose as well.
If you do wish to do this event, I personally recommend waiting towards the end of the party, since it keeps people from leaving early and people will wait for it, if they know it's coming later.
#5. Cake Cutting
Basically, the only thing you need to remember is, if your photographer is on a limited time frame, that you get this done before he (or she's) time is up.
You can always cut the cake for the photo and then the cake can sit and staff can serve it up for you later. Just because you cut the cake early, doesn't mean you have to eat it right away.
It is nice, though, to cut it later in the evening, if your photographers schedule allows, since this is another such "event" that people will wait on, thus extending the life of your party.
Any music for this will work. There's ideas on this site at ERIC's WEDDING JUKEBOX page, or you can invent your own.
#6. Toast to the Bride & Groom
This can happen anytime, but I suggest you do it at one of two time frames:
a) You do it during dinner, while everyone is seated and quiet.
b) You do it at the cake table, after the cake cutting ceremony.
NOTE: If you do the toast before dinner, you can do it right after the "blessing of the meal" (if that's something that you have planned).
The biggest thing you have to remember is THIS: The staff is going to need AT LEAST 15-20 minutes warning to pour the champagne for all your guests (if you have pre-arranged champagne in your plans).
#7. Other Notes
a) Buffets serve more people faster than plated dinners (something good to know if you are on a limited time frame with a large group).
b) When you throw the bouquet indoors, throw low. Especially if there are ceiling fans in the room.
c) Garters don't weigh much. They are very light. If you are tossing it, toss it as HARD as you can. Most barely float the air very far. You can also snap it, but make sure it has a very tight band if you do.
c) Outdoor events are great--but make sure there are no time restraints with the place you are holding it. Most resorts have a time-limit of 10:00pm-10:30pm.
When you are indoors, this doesn't matter and sometimes you can go late into the night (different places vary and have different rules).
d) The average length of a reception is 4 hours. Most people are pretty wiped out after 5 or more hours. Two hours can work, but it doesn't allow hardly anytime for dancing most times.
If you are renting a private Villa and sleeping at the place you are partying---that extends the life of a party by several more hours, due to convenience.
HAVE MORE QUESTIONS? Write me and I'll be glad to help you! ericthedj2002@yahoo.com
Ten Tips for a Successful Destination Wedding
#1. Get Help
If you've signed up for a wedding package, the services of a planner are probably included. If not, try to earmark part of your budget (about 10 percent of the total) for a wedding planner. He or she can shoulder the burden of researching, auditioning, and securing local vendors -- especially valuable if said vendors are far from your home base. She can sometimes also the behind-the-scene queen, creating gift bags for guests, greeting everyone at the airport, keeping people busy with fun activities once there, vetting special requests (babysitters, dry cleaners, etc.), and getting everyone where they need to be on time.#2. Schedule a Test Drive
Remember, unlike a wedding in your hometown, guests are TOTALLY dependent on you once they reach the destination. Make sure you provide transportation to and from the airport, as well as to all the events of the weekend.#3. Take a Trip
If you've decided not to hire a wedding planner (or one isn't provided as part of a wedding package), plan to visit the destination after you've finalized your guest count. You'll need to scout and secure your key venues -- church, reception, hotels for guests, rehearsal dinner venue -- and local suppliers such as caterers, florists, photographers, etc. Next -- or during a second trip -- you'll need to schedule a meeting with your caterer, see sample bouquets from the florist, plan a hair/makeup session with a salon, and organize activities (golf, tennis, walking tours, museums) for everyone.#4. Vendor Checkups
If you must hire your vendors sight unseen, ask for a portfolio of pictures and at least three references. Be sure the references are people for whom the vendor did an event similar to yours. For example, a recommendation from a couple who had 10 guests doesn't help if you're inviting 100. Also ask for the names of other vendors who worked those events and use them as further references regarding the company in question.#5. Forewarn Your Friends
Tell your bridal party about the destination before you ask them to stand by your side so that they can gracefully decline if finances are tight.#6. Get a Grip
Don't be upset if some of your closest friends or relatives don't attend. While you are, in a sense, footing some of the food bills, their fees for travel, hotel, and car rental can really add up, especially for a family. And while your wedding is, in a sense, a mini-vacation for you, it may not be the one they want to take!#7. Mind Mother Nature
Don't forget to consider the climate when choosing your dress. A Cinderella gown made of satin doesn't fare well in high humidity. Whether your dream location is specifically a beach or simply outdoors, dress for no stress. Also be wary of wind in an outdoor location as well as your choice of cake...buttercream frosting, for example, doesn't do well in the heat! Upswept hair and strong tropical tradewinds also don't pair well.#8. Pack Right
Whatever you buy to bring with you, just remember that you have to lug it along. Don't forget to allow ample room for "The Dress".#9. Call On a Courier
Don't forget to plan for potential wedding presents. If you've got a ton of wedding gifts to take home, ask if someone who lives in your city can take them back and keep them for you until after the honeymoon -- or even drop them at your home for you. Or, pack an extra duffle bag to bring them home yourselves. Figure this out before the wedding so you'll have a plan of action if you need it.#10. Welcome Your Guests
A nice touch is to place a gift basket in each room that is full of essentials for the trip (suntan lotion, bug spray, etc.) and goodies that will remind them of the setting -- music, cookbooks or samples of native treats (rum balls!), or crafts from local artisans, for example. If you need a place to get started on baskets, a good place to look is to call the "Basket Queen"--Tahra Richardson (also mentioned below as a member of the TNT band) at (340) 775-1253.
Bands versus DJ's
Well, I AM a DJ and I would love your business...however...if you wish to hire a band, keep the following in mind.
TIP #1: Most bands have certain songs and formats they play; variety is not a strong point for most local bands.
TIP #2: Most bands consist of 4-6 people for 3-4 hours. Also, there are not many bands on St John, and St Thomas isn't brimming with many either. If you do book band, you'll need to book way far in advance, usually several months. The truly good bands are usually running on a very tight schedule.
TIP #3: Get a demo tape or CD of what they play and review it before you book the band. Remember that what is on that disc is usually the BEST they will sound.
TIP #4: Bands are not DJ's and DJ's are not bands! What I mean by this is that there are many people who play in bands think that they are DJ's. That's like when Micheal Jordan (athlete) who dominated the game of basketball tried to go out and play baseball. Remember how he did? GREAT at basketball and "just OK" at baseball. There is a difference. Be wary of band members who are GREAT band members, attempting to go out and play DJ. Some are able to pull it off, but very few are able to really cross over and do both.
TIP #5: If you do want a band, I highly recommend calling Tahra Richardson with the "TNT Band" (340) 775-1253 (for all styles) or Sandra Massac of the "P'your Passion Band" (for local soca) at (340) 690-2487. You really can't get much better then these two bands.
TIP #6: Steel Pan Players are a great bargain. Although they don't really get the dancing going, they provide a wonderful atmosphere at a great, reasonable cost. I highly recommend them for cocktail times and dinner hours. They really add to the mood of the whole event.
My two favorite steel panners are:
ANDREW DOUGLAS (on St Thomas) (340) 690-8652 or (340) 714-5311
CARL FREEDMON (on St John) (340) 693-8407
Both guys are in high demand, so book early if you want the best!
There's also a great article on THE KNOT about "Shall I hire a band or a DJ?" --there are several things to consider when hiring one or the other.
Good Advice: Bands Versus DJ's
Need some female advice from other Brides?
Check out www.theknot.com for great forums and more great ideas.
It's a huge site, full of info and tons of forums. You'll love it.